Renewal

After about a year of absence and not too much going on before that, I am in a totally new space, both spiritually and physically.  I have retired from the job world and have dived into the unknown through the door of retirement.  I have changed continents, countries, language and culture without an anchor or even a friend in my new abode.  It has been intentional and with a degree of the spirit of adventure that I have created this new challenge at this time in my life.  I had reached a level of boredom, or at least:  I am done with my current lifestyle and having the privilege of not having anyone to answer to I created the opportunity to explore a new level of life experience.  I came to the realization that it was now or never.  I still have plenty of years to go as far as can be predicted, and enough enthusiasm and energy to try to follow some of the dreams of my youth that I never got around to before.

My intentions in writing this in a blog format is to share my progression of experiences, the pitfalls and successes of my journey in self-discovery and hopefully give others some encouragement to follow their own journey of self-discovery.  I have been blessed with an ability to step into the unknown without too much trepidation about what might follow.  So far it has never lead me into anything I have not been able to handle and has always provided opportunities to self-reflect and grow as a person and as a soul.  In general, I will try to weave into my tales, the details of how I got to where I am today without a particular biographical sketch.  I will add that I see life as a journey of self-discovery not only on the physical and intellectual levels, but particularly, on a spiritual level.  By that I mean that I believe all aspects of life are connected and that the spiritual aspect of our lives drives all the other aspects.  I do not follow any religious doctrine, but I have studied many of the tenets of the major religions.  I follow my own path, which is basically aligned with the more eastern philosophies of zen and tao and the rhythms of nature.

I have spent the past year meditating, meeting new people, doing some traveling and finding that I needed to set some specific goals in order to maintain my sanity .  I found that the most challenging aspect of not going to a job is to find meaningful activities with which to spend my newly liberated hunks of time.  The idea that one just needs to follow one’s bliss is wonderful, if you have a clear idea of what that means to you.  There have been many things in my life which engaged my passion and made my heart sing, but that turned out to be the problem:  many things.   I asked myself which of these many things I would like to re-engage in.

As I started to explore different avenues, I found that some just did not grab me like they used to. For example,  I have always felt very drawn to healing since I was quite young and in fact went on to study biology and medically related areas, working in research during my career.  However, during the years in academic research I found myself questioning much of what I saw taking place around me, including the whys and wherefors.  I leaned more and more towards the alternative healing modalities.  I decided to take a course in Reiki, which is basically an energy healing modality.  It is Although I find it very beneficial, I also found I could not muster the enthusiasm with which I saw others engage and so I am currently dis-engaging from an active pursuit of this avenue.   I am finding that trial and error may be what will determine my next step in : finding my bliss.

I will continue my explorations of renewal and following the trail of finding bliss in the next post.  It will be an on-going documentation and I hope some of you will find an interest in sharing your adventures with me as well.  I welcome you to join me in this journey of self-discovery.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Solo Journey

Alone, so alone.DSCN0008

Why?

Outside as well as Inside.

No one to share the depths of my soul with.

Why?

Screaming inside sometimes.  Talking with people, superficial.

Talking with myself, lonely.

Not that I can’t find answers; they’re there.

I just want to share them, compare notes,

Share experiences. Share love, sensuality.  Feel deeply.

Isn’t that why we’re here?

I’m looking for heart to heart connections, not finding many.

Everybody is so busy; no time to live life.

No time to be in the heart.

Do you remember who you are?  Where you came from?

We’re all in this together, whether we acknowledge it or not.

We came from the same source, limitlessness, the infinite.

Now we seem to be lost among the stars, drifting through time and space.

Alone. Separate. On a solo journey.

Really?